


In these late hours i need you the most

by Sapphicdaydreams



Category: IT (2017)
Genre: Chubby Eddie, M/M, Was gonna be fluffy but turned out kinda sad, but happy sad ya know? Like “things are gonna be okay” kinda sad, eddie has body issues, eddie is sleepy and sad, eddie kaspbrak is basically me and richie is the gf i wish i had, half of this is texting, richie wants to make him feel better, the boys are 16, tw for body issues and trust issues, writing this because i feel lonely
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-04 00:23:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14008071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sapphicdaydreams/pseuds/Sapphicdaydreams
Summary: Established relationship, boyfriends of a year and counting. Eddie cant sleep like always and is a sad boy. Richie wishes eddie could accept his love but he knows thats hard for eddie. Richie is all eddie could ever ask for though and he does his very best. Lots of sad boys in this but its only because they love eachother so so so much





	In these late hours i need you the most

**Author's Note:**

> I HAVE A REDDIE TUMBLR! Its http://eddieeatsspaghetti.tumblr.com !! Im a sad lesbian with issues and i relate to eddie on a rediculous level so i wrote a fic about him and richie being a pure good couple to make my lonely ass feel happy. Admittedly this is all projecting dont come for me

It was late at night and eddie couldnt sleep. He was a troubled boy and everyone knew it. When eddie kaspbrak got tired he became a wreck, richie had dubbed him “the bean spiller” because that boy had no filter when he was running on low. Eddie was scared to bother richie, he always felt like a fucking bother. All he wanted was comfort from his loving boyfriend but he was always so scared to ask. Scared that asking meant that he would become a bother to him, a chore. Eddie hated feeling like a chore. In his past relationships he had always felt like a chore, a fucking pissbaby that had to be dealt with daily. Fuck.

Eddie turned over in bed and opened up his phone. It was 1am. He checked his notifications, some instagram likes and a youtube subscription. Eh. Eddie opened his messaging app. Richies name appeared atop the screen as who he was contacting.

Eddie: Rich i cant sleep

.... a few minutes passed

Eddie: richie are you there?

... 2 minutes passed, eddie counted that time.

Eddie: richie you are fucking beautiful

Eddie: rich i 

Eddie: rich i loooovvveee youuuuu

Eddie: richie if you were a plant youd be a tree because yur stroNg and nice to lay under

Eddie: lol that was dirty whahaahsvwnsue sorry im gross

Eddie: please say you love me sorry im needy

Eddie: bad bad im bad

 

richie had finally been woken up by the constant ringing of his phone. He scratched his head, put on his glasses, and opened it to the flood of messages from eddie. He typed to his boyfriend

Richie: hey baby whats going on?

Eddie responded fast as lightnening

Eddie: omgomgomgOMG richie rich babsgty

Eddie: i thot u died :(

Richie: ahah what no i was just asleep. Are you good? 

Eddie: yeh im good whattsa mean

Richie: Eds i know you, you only stay up this late when youre sad

EddIe: thaT is SO NOT TRU

Eddie: i stayd up because i cant atop thinkin abt uuuu ;0

Richie: eddie you are a little goof ball sometimes you know that

Eddie: richiuuuiiii

Richie: yes eddie?

Eddie: do u have a crush on me

Richie: eds, we have been dating for a year now of course i have a crush on you

Eddie: even tho im uhgly?

Richie: Eddie you arent ugly

Eddie: ur only saying that to save my feelings im fat n gross and bad 

Eddie: bad bad bad

Eddie: BAD

Richie: eddie stop

Eddie: BAD FAT BAD IM BAD DONT LIKE ME

Richie; eddie please stop

Eddie: im sorry

Richie: eds dont be sorry

Eddie: i keep fucking up. Im sorry im so fucking broken. Fucking unlovable

Richie: eddie if you were unlovable then how do i love you?

Richie: if you are unlovable then why do i think about you every day?

Richie: if you are unlovable then why do i want to drive over there and give you a million kisses and kiss every part of you you say you hate

 

Eddie started crying, crying of happiness and crying of guilt. He was awful. He didnt deserve his richie. His rich. His chee. He choked down sobs, afraid his mother would hear. Then he got a call.

”Hey eds its me,, are you okay?”

richie sounded worried through the phone

”y. Ye, yea im uh im fine” eddie tried to say and pipe down his sobbing

”Eddie no you arent baby what happened?”

”n-nothin at all youre so silly im fine” eddie couldnt stop sniffling

”no you arent. Tell me now or im coming over”

”no no please dont come over rich please i-“

he heard an engine start on the other line. Eddie went silent for a moment

” richie no please stay home its okay im sorry im so so sorry”

” eddie why do you keep saying sorry baby there is nothing to say sorry for”

”im bad bad so bad im so sorry rich im so bad”

”Eds no you arent you are the best person i know stop that right now” richie raised his voice a bit, overcome with emotion

”dont be mad at me stop yelling”

”baby, baby im not mad at you. Im sorry i raised my voice its okay its okay” richie cooed out trying to calm his boyfriend

”its not okay i want you to hate me”

the line went silent and eddie could hear richies muffled cries

”see. See i make you sad. I make you cry. Im a bad person. A bad boyfriend. A piece of fucking shit” Eddie started sobbing.

then the call hung up.

fuck fuck what did eddie do. He knew he was a fuck up he made richie sad hes so fucking worthless. Eddie covered his head with a pillow and sobbed grossly. Richie was gonna leave him. He was a mess, a bad horrible terrible mess. He made richie sad. Bad eddie bad eddie BAD-

he heard a knock on his window. It was richie. Before he could answer richie was already crawling though.

”rich, i-“

richie got through and walked to eddie with his head down. He got closed and pulled eddie in for an embrace. A tight embrace, as if he feared that if he let eddie go he would be gone forever. Eddie was shocked at first but relaxed into it. He could hear and feel muffled sobs on his shoulder. Wet tears soaking his shirtless shoulder. 

“Rich, richie please”

eddies voice was strained, fuck he was going to cry. 

“richie please its okay im okay”

richie drew back, his face held a weak smile and tear stained cheeks, wet streaks that glittered in the light of the moon behind him.

”eddie, i love you”, richie looked down, unable to look eddie in the eyes

eddie put his hand on richies arm and rubbed circles into it.

”i know baby, i know”, eddies gaze still fixed on him, trying to give a comforting smile

”then, then why do you get so sad eds? Why, why cant i help you? Sometimes i get scared you dont know that i love you eddie. You say that i dont and it hurts.”

eddie looked shocked. He never realized his own insecurities had hurt richie.

”richie, baby. Its, its a lot more complicated than that. More complicated than you saying you love me and me believeing it”

”why does it have to be though, its not fair” richie mumbled through his tears 

“richie ive been hurt before, hurt so bad. I, i cant trust anyone even when i want to. Id blame my mother but its half way my fault for develouping these issues. Rich, i dont want trust issues but i have them. I dont want insecurities but i have them. I dont want these things yet i deal with them every day. Im sorry rich, im sorry if i hurt you. You can leave any time you want i know im fucking broken”

Richie sobbed harder and looked Eddie straight in the eyes

”Eddie dont you get it? Im never going to  leave you. Im stuck to your side like fucking glue. Fucking welded metal. I wish i could say something to show you how much i love you. Id give anything to snap my fingers and let you know. Eddie i love every fucking piece of you. I love your eyes, your hands, your legs, your tummy, your smile. Fuck eddie i could list a hundred things and not even be a fourth of the way through. You say youre broken but you arent. Maybe you have cracks but we all do. And i hope my love can be the glue that keeps those cracks from becoming bigger. I hope i can be that for you. And , and i know that i cant make it better always, but im here eddie. I WANT to be bothered. I WANT to be asked for help. And no matter how much it hurts me to see you sad ill get over it and understand that you need me. Baby i-“

eddie cut him of with a kiss. A messy, sloppy kiss. Eddie had to pull back immediatly because he was sobbing too hard to kiss his lover properly. Fuck. Eddie felt so stupid but he felt so fucking loved. He latched onto Richie and held him tight like a baby koala, dragging him to his bed.

Eddie clung to richies chest as they both cried. Cried for eddies pain, cried for the way richie was affected, cried for their love, and cried for how lucky they were to have eachother. They cried for what seemed like hours, but it eventually turned into small sobs and then quiet. Eddie twirled his finger in richies hair, his droopy eyes looking back into his own. “Richie”, eddie spoke softly, “it may take me a while to love myself, and to let me be loved by you but,” he stopped to smile away the tears reforming in his eyes, “but the way you speak to me, the way you smile at me, the way you are always there. Richie it makes me feel so loved and it brings me closer to accepting it every day.” . Eddie pressed his forhead to richies chest and held him tighter, “you are all i will ever need. You are enough. You are strong and you are there for me. You give me what i need and i know it may take a while for my emotions to adjust but. But you give me all i could ever ask for.”. He smiled sadly and sighed, “and im, im sorry if im not all you could ask for”. Richie held Eddie tighter when he said that, tears swelling again. “You are everything i want and more my spaghetti man”, richie nuzzled his face into eddies hair and pulled him even closer (if that was even possible). He didnt want a single part of eddie not touching him, we wanted to be as close as possible, wanted eddie to feel his love. Eddie nuzzled into Richies chest more and kissed it. Richie kissed eddies head. Then they lay there until they fell asleep. Feeling safe in eachothers arms. 

**Author's Note:**

> This got darker than i expected. Oops. Love these boys though. Sorry if its hard to read this is legit just my emotions on a page i know its kinda horrible


End file.
